5/13/2016 0 Comments #NAKEDME“My boyfriend took me to Disneyland for our one-year anniversary, And I never got to go when I was younger, And it was so nice to go when you’re an adult because you can actually remember what happens. I also just love spending time with my boyfriend because he came into my life at a time When I was wondering if I was actually deserving of love, So I was really blessed to meet him. Also he held my hand on all the rides and that was awesome." “When I was a junior in high school both of my grandparents on my mom's side passed away. They were the glue that held everyone together, So when they weren't there our family started to drift apart, We didn't see each other as much and that was tough for me. My grades suffered and my friends were concerned about me, But they talked to guidance counselors about it instead of talking to me. When I got called in, I thought I was in trouble and I was so embarassed because I didn't really tell a lot of people what happened.” “I'm so proud of myself for pushing through this year. I had an internship and two leadership positions and a senior capstone, So it was a huge growing up process because there were some days that I was gone for 12 hours. I did more growing up this semester than I did my entire college career.” “I didn’t really realize how privileged I actually was when I was growing up. My mom was the sole breadwinner for our family and we relied on her paycheck, And I just didn’t realize my parents were trying so hard to give me a good life, And I wish that I would have appreciated them more. When I was growing up I was mad at my parents for not giving me what eveyrone else had, And I’m still mad at myself for not appreciating for what they were able to do for me." "A defining moment for me was starting college. For a while I thought that college was going to be a wondrous escape, But I had to grow up really fast due to issues of feeling lonely and problems with roommates. I was forced to get to know myself because I realized I didn't know myself as well as I thought I did." "I’m really proud of my writing ability. I write about difficult issues that people just don’t talk about. The story I got an award for was about child abuse so I write dark pieces, Which most people purposefully stray away from. I've definitely seen myself grow as a writer at my time at Chapman.” “I kind of don’t like my body sometimes specifically my lower half. I’m ashamed of my legs even though they’re really long, And I feel uncomfortable wearing short shorts. But I’ve been working out more so I feel more empowered, But there are still days when I look in the mirror and say 'ew.' When I was a sophomore in high school, I started training in ballet seriously, And I was placed in classes with prepubescent girls because I was late, And I felt awkward and fat in front of them because I had breasts and hips, And even though I was three or four years older than them, I was very aware of the fact that I looked different than them." "I'm afraid of loneliness. In high school I didn’t feel like I had any solid friends and that was really tough for me. I felt like nobody really understood the kind of issues that I was having and the people that were my friends would give me backhanded compliments, So I worry that I’m going to lose people and not be close to anyone at the end of the day." “I want to love myself more.
I mean I’m pretty badass when I think about it. I’ve grown so much as a person and I’m strong because of that and because I’ve gone through so much, And I’m proud of who I've become. Lately a lot of people have been telling me that I’m going to go far after graduation, And now I can feel comfrtable saying 'Yes I will,' And it took me a long time to gain that comfort but now that I do, I feel amazing. Honestly I got in my own way a lot. I am such a perfectionist. If I do one thing wrong, I'll get so down on myself. I would blame myself for a lot of things, But now I’m happy and content knowing that I’m not perfect and that’s okay.”
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